Fibroids and Bloating

 Fibroids are benign tumors, which means they can definitely have some girth to them.  Some fibroids removed from women, have been the size of a grapefruit... so it's no surprise that they can make a woman appear 2-3 months pregnant in some cases.

In fact, in a sick way, when a uterus is riddled with fibroids (especially the kind that sit inside the lining of the uterus), it's like the patient is "pregnant" with them... so it's actually quite common that women with this condition will opt for maternity pants for comfort!

A uterus with a large fibroid inside it

The only real way to relieve this bloating, is to either have a myectomy to remove the fibroids themselves... but due to risk of heavy bleeding from this procedure (and knowing that fibroids can grow again) a hysterectomy is much more common.  After about 8 weeks of healing, a lot of women who have had a hysterectomy report a great sense of relief!

Here is a personal example of what my belly has started to look like...

Anyway, if you are experiencing a heavy, bloated feeling and you have tested whether it's dietary, and you know you're not pregnant, please make an appointment with your gynecologist!

1-year Anniversary

 Hi everyone!  👋

So, I wouldn't really call this a "celebration", exactly... just can't believe that it's already been a year + 1 day since this blog was started!

In early September last year, I got diagnosed with fibroids after having seriously heavy bleeding, prolonged periods, and excruciatingly painful cramps.... it was a surreal diagnosis, especially when the doctor told me to get a hysterectomy to ease the symptoms and reduce the risk of fatal bleeding...

Admittedly, I was tempted to get that surgery right away, but I was also in the middle of a major life change, with leaving one long-time job and starting a new one... so that time period didn't work.  Then we had a family trip shortly after that, so eventually - against my better judgement - I put this much-needed hysterectomy on a back burner....

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It's currently September 29, 2020, and there is no doubt that my fibroids are causing me more grief... 

• I constantly have a "swelly belly" that feels heavy and painful. It makes me look 2-3 months pregnant, and causes low-grade aches 24/7.  The maternity pants are actually feeling tight now.
• There is spotting that is hard to monitor... it's random enough now that I basically wear light pads 24/7 now, and sometimes use a tampon before enjoying a bath at any time of the month....
• This spotting has thrown a wrench into mine & Rob's intimacy... it's scary not knowing if I'll "break the damn" and bleed all over him and the bed 😨
• It's becoming the norm to get up in the middle of the night and pee a river... even when I don't drink a lot of water before bed, the growing fibroids' weight rests on top of my bladder while lying down. It's been waking me up almost constantly!
• Quite frankly, my fibroid symptoms are at a point where I kind of feel like I'm already recovering from a hysterectomy, since some of the symptoms can be similar.

So, after my hubby's upcoming birthday in early October, I'm going to pull up my belt, sniff with pride, and call my family doctor for a year follow up, leading to surgery.... It feels like it's time...

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Before I go today, I'd like to mention that, as a surgery looms in the future, the heaviness of financial uncertainty weighs on both mine & Rob's minds.  Yes I do have savings put aside for that time period... it's just that I don't yet know how many weeks I'll be recovering, and how much work I'll be missing.  My position at work doesn't really offer much in the way of sick leave or medical benefits, which is why I've been working on building up savings... 

                                                                                                                                                                      

Anyway, as you know, I'm a cartoonist by trade and have a Patreon page about it. I'd really appreciate if you could consider making small monthly pledges, and in exchange, you'll get rewards such as coloring pages, stickers, and more. 

Thank you for being with me along the last year of this journey!

This time last year...

 Wow.  It's already been over a year since I first got diagnosed with fibroids... 

I remember feeling horrified, relieved, and partly expecting it, as fibroids do run in my family and both my mother and grandmother have had hysterectomies due to them. 

It was within the first week of September that I sat in the doctor's office, already suspecting something serious, going by his tone. Especially since he tried calling me shortly after the ultrasound I had prior.  After he told me, we discussed possible treatment options... I had a lump in my throat, as I was on the verge of tears, but trying to sound strong I casually suggested birth control pills to slow down the bleeding... he thought about it, but said that would make the bleeding even heavier.  He strongly suggested a hysterectomy was best, especially since my "main" fibroid seems to take up almost half my uterus... did at the time in 2019, I don't know about now...

I thanked him for his time, and went on my way for a light lunch to the Dairy Queen across the street... I was in such a daze, that I accidentally bit off a small part of the tip of my tongue (ouch!) while eating... to this day, the tip of my tongue is misshapen from it.  I still felt like crying, and a lot of thoughts were going through my head... I was trying to come up with the right words to tell my husband that I'd need this surgery... and confirmed forever that we won't be having any babies. 

 I took a ruler and drew, as per what the measurements were in the ultrasound findings, my womb and the fibroids' size in relation. The biggest one seems to be the main culprit for the cramping pain and the heavy bleeding... it was 2.5 cm wide at the time, and a year later, probably bigger! 

So, though I know it's very important to get these removed for my health (to stop being anemic, to reduce the risk of fatal hemorrhaging, to improve quality of life with no cramps, etc.) it seemed that everything was happening to impede the ability to have surgery at the time...

• I was in the process of leaving one job and beginning another (this blog started on September 28, which is the same day I left my job at Old Navy after 7 years). 
• We had family trips coming up, pre-booked long in advance so I wasn't able to be recovering at the same time...
• After the trips, I was going to try again to book a surgery, but the Covid19 pandemic hit, and the hospital closed down to anything considered non-emergency, while they dealt with lots of cases of the bug. Now they are slowly reopening...

I feel mentally and emotionally (and physically) ready for this surgery now that it's been so long since diagnosis... just need to make an appointment with my family physician and get more tests to see where I stand with these fibroids, and then we can go from there...

What Women Want Men to Know About Periods

First of all, we want you to know what, specifically, a period actually is: Menstruation comes from the uterus, not the bladder (Yes there are some younger males who have thought this). 

•  It's not something we can consciously control, like peeing. It trickles out whether we want it to or not, and we're sorry (not sorry) if our needing to hit the washroom more often because of it, annoys you. 

•  It's caused by varying levels of hormones, which are responsible for creating a lining in our uterus in case you get us pregnant.  That lining lasts for several days, and then sort of "spoils" and begins to shed, so a fresh, new lining can grow in it's place.  It's this lining that comes out of us... and it's a mix of blood and other soft tissue and fluid.  BTW, it's harmless to you if you ever touch it. 

• They're not always painful, but when they are, the pain is real and we're not exaggerating!  The closest way to describe it is how you feel after getting a hit to the testicles, and this pain can cause fever and even vomiting sometimes...the pain is real!

• We can be more in the mood for sex during this time, due to hormone fluctuations...and honestly wish you wouldn't be so grossed out by our menstrual fluid. It won't hurt you, and if you're worried about something like AIDS, you can use a condom for peace of mind.  **Bonus: Having an orgasm can help relieve our cramps!

• We wish you'd ask us more questions about it, so we can bond on a deeper level (especially for long-time spouses). Most of us are fairly comfortable discussing our periods.

• If we're cranky around you during this time, it's partly hormones, but also a reaction to being in strong pain.  It's normal to be snappy when in pain and you would be the same way.

• Sometimes we're low energy or "slow" to get something. Please give us a break - our brains & bodies are losing vital nutrients from blood loss. For this reason, food cravings are real, too (sweets for upping low blood sugar).

• Please don't mock us for menstruating, like joking to your buddies that "she's on the rag again!"  That's period-shaming, and it's derogatory.  We're whole human entities and having the ability to menstruate is just one of many aspects of that... it doesn't define us. 

• Also, please don't get scared and try to avoid us during that week... Yes we can be a tad moody, but that can be resolved with a loving cuddle and a small surprise gift ("no honey, I'll do the laundry tonight").

• No two periods are exactly alike, regardless of what media often implies. Your lady night have hers every few months, twice a month, or for weeks at a time.  Being on birth control, or having health problems, can cause irregular periods. Please don't compare hers to that of a relative or former girlfriend... we're all unique beings :)

If you're married or in a long-term partnership with us, try to learn specific details about our periods, such as: 

• When to expect it 
• How long it typically lasts 
• What we prefer for pads/tampons/cups
• Specific food we crave
• What pain relief we tend to use

This can make the bond between us stronger... and help you appreciate all aspects of us. 

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Ladies, I am always happy to "take requests" and update this article with anything that you'd like to add to the list, so your man can have a deeper appreciation for what you go through each month, or every few months, or twice a month, or however your period is for you.   

Super Absorbency Pads and Tampons

 That embarrassing - but necessary - trip to Costco. 

If you have a menstrual bleeding disorder, then you know what it's like to need these giant value packs.

In fact, my husband & I have made it a hobby of sorts to track sales in flyers and "clean house" when they're on sale (currently, our laundry room is loaded with them). 

When I was in my teens, my mother taught me how to track periods on the calendar by tracking & marking the days. This works for a typical 28-day cycle... but these past couple of years, my cycles have become anything but typical.  I still mark the "due date" on the calendar and then begin wearing pads about a week out, since on numerous occasions Aunt Flo has crashed the party by showing up early. 

I'll admit, I envy women with normal cycles (and normal flow!) - you ladies sure save a lot of money!  And, though I'm not super looking forward to having a surgery, I am looking forward to the day when I no longer need these and will donate my remaining supply to the local Food Bank, and then will save so much $$$ going forward!

Remember: Just like they say in the commercial - if your tampon leaks, go up a size. If it hurts to remove it, go down a size.  Same for pads - if it's soaked through or leaking, go up an absorbency level (and always get wings). If it's mostly dry or feels like wearing a diaper, then go down a level.  Remember that they are color-coded for your convenience. 

Hysterectomy Support Groups

 It can be a frightening time in any woman's life... being told you need to have a hysterectomy.

Whether the reason is cancer, endometriosis, fibroids or something else, the anxiety about such a surgery, is very real.  And unless you have a mother, grandmother, sister, aunt, or friend who can relate and share her experience with you, it's hard to know where to turn with that anxiety about it.

Any surgery can be scary, but this is one that eliminates the ability to have children and for many of us, that is a lot to deal with....

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When I was diagnosed with fibroids last year, I was told the best course of action would be to have a hysterectomy.  I asked about shrinking them with birth control, but was told changing my hormone levels would actually grow them.  Then I suggested the artery embolization, but the risk of fatal blood clots is fairly high. I was told that just removing the fibroids themselves is an option if I want to preserve my fertility, but fibroids almost always come back, and sometimes worse!

So, knowing that I will eventually be having a hysterectomy, I went to facebook and searched support groups.  Other women in the same boat, can be such an amazing resource - a real sisterhood 💕

Here are some good hysterectomy support groups to join on facebook:

• Young Hysterectomy and or Menopause Sisters
• Hysterectomy Sisters
• Hysterectomy Sisterectomy 

In addition to the online ones, you can also reach out to your local Primary Care Network or Community Health Centre, to inquire about any in-person support groups they may offer in your area.  

It can be of great help for what to expect during prep and the days leading up, and what to expect during healing.  The experienced ladies can help you make an effective post-op recovery plan that you can get your whole family in on. 

Remember, no matter what happens, you've got this. You're strong and you needed that surgery because what was hindering you, was significantly worse than the outcome.